waiting for a little life

Spring is something else, eh?  We wait and wait and wait for the teeniest bit of green to lift our spirits from the bitterness of winter and when it comes, we say, "I can't believe it!  It's finally here!" and yet we knew it would be here sometime.  Part of what makes these signs of life so exciting is that we KNOW it's coming; we think about how wonderful it will be, how it will smell, and how it will make us feel when we wake up each day knowing the goodness of life is all around.

Our house is showing signs of life, too. 

Even though outside snow may come and cover up peeking tulip/lily/iris bulbs that prompted some landscaping daydreaming this week, inside things are growing.  A plant survived a winter with me.  Not only did it survive, it's BLOOMING!  It's a Spring miracle, I tell you!  Mom better read this because she will be very proud that a plant in her daughter's care has finally stayed alive.  I don't even know the name of this gem but I plan on getting at least five more this summer to fill my house to make visitors think I have a magical green thumb.


The Seedling Adventure has also begun.  The first chapter goes something like this:

       ....she carefully placed each seed in their respective nook, gently covered them with precisely mixed soil, gave them a blessing, and waited for the sun and water to do its work.  Sometime during the night, the cat, who was irked there was neither catnip nor cat grass planted, decided to take matters into her own paws.  The gardener woke up, cursed the cat, and the romantic dream of planting and nurturing seedlings until they bore fruit, died.

So, yeah, we'll see how it goes.  So far the onions are going crazy.  I think onions might be one of those invasive species you have to gather and light on fire if you don't want it to spread.

The other thing that is growing in our house is a SCOBY for making Kombucha.  It's a big glob of bacteria and yeast that eats tea and sugar and somehow balances your intestinal flora.  Kombucha and I so far have a love love, hate hate hate relationship.  I loved it, carefully prepared it, waited 3 weeks (quite impatiently) for it to reach the right pH, only to find out it had mold!  You would think something as gross as a SCOBY could tackle some mold, but it couldn't.  Dumping out 3 weeks' worth of fermenting tea, I felt defeated.  This batch is going much better, and I'm being much more patient.  In fact, this photo was the only time I've uncovered it to look at the disgustingly beautiful alien being. 

Waiting around for life (and sometimes being disappointed) has been a bit of a roller coaster.  But I'm still waking up, hopeful. 

Blogbattical: a year without blogging

Sometimes we need to break away from things because they are unhealthy, sometimes because of time constraints, sometimes for reasons we don't know.  The last year required me to take a break from the reflection that blogging offered.  I would only later come to understand why.  The break freed up time (as sabbaticals often do) and I wish I could say I used my time to write a book (or at least read a bunch of them), knit a grown-up sweater, or sew something really difficult.  Yeah, well, none of those things happened.  I just got older.

I used to think I would accept age humbly and joyfully.  What a load of crap.  This year I found (TWO!) gray hairs and didn't get carded buying wine at the liquor store.  I cannot stay up past 10pm without pacing around the house groaning, "it's so laaaate!"  This winter, I begged Matt to grow a beard so he would look older (and not like a kid I was babysitting).  I now enjoy and PREFER to stay home on Friday night.

Despite my aging crisis, the year did not pass without gain and triumph.  In that extra time, I did some stuff  I'm quite proud of.  I finished all but 2 credits towards my Masters and started my research project.  A 9 month old was entrusted to me each weekday for half of the year.  I ran a marathon.  I rode a horse into the mountains and then climbed the mountain.  A teenager showed up, needing our love, time, and home cooking.  I started teaching again.  We found a church.  I found the perfect pizza crust recipe.  I finally learned how to tame my (graying) hair.   
   

The year was not a total loss. 

But I'm back to the familiar 'click click click' that puts ME out there to YOU, whoever, wherever you are.  My blogbatical is over.  The trees are aching to show us that they are alive, and I'm aching to let go of things I should have done and open up to the possibility that this year, too, will age and better me.