O Holy (Korean) Night

Some days I forget where I am. I get caught up in grading, busied by schedules and meetings, and errands. Then I go to the corner store because I need to wash my clothes and I'm out of detergent. I end up leaving the store not quite sure if I've just bought detergent, fabric softener or toilet cleaner. Then I remember where I am. I was in a funk when I went into the store. When I left, I was out of the funk because I was laughing at my "soap" or whatever it was. I am thankful for this strange sense of humor I have been blessed with by God. I also think it's funny I am currently eating pb & j straight from the jar. YUM. Does God care about pb&j? I think so.

Next year I'm bringing more decorations. My candle, tree + 1 ornament, and angel are very nice, but Rosa has asked for at least a stocking next year. She's very disappointed in my Christmas spirit this year. I try to remind her it's not about presents and decorations; she just scoffs and me and returns to her very important apartment alley watch from the window.

I can't grade anymore. I am tired. I am homesick. I am way too white and pasty, even for Korea. I am still joyful. :) (see previous post) I am (trying to be) patient. I (try to) trust God's winterwonderful plan for me. I am storing up these things in my heart.

Long lay the world, in sin and error pining...if the world can wait a thousand years for a Savior, then I can wait a few for things I want too. :) I am joyful....

I'll be (missing) home for Christmas

My definition of 'home' has changed a bit since I've been in Korea. I find myself feeling at home in very odd places. We went to the nore-closet after Emily's birthday dinner. The nore-closet is like the norebang (karaoke room) but smaller. Its a closet where you pay around 50 cents to sing 2 songs. As you can see, it is amazing. There is nothing that says home more than being shoved in a closet with your friends and singing Ska8er Boi.

I had Thanksgiving dinner a few weeks ago at the Pinho's apartment with a bunch of other teachers. The Pinho's are a nice family who are always laughing. It was funny to look at my new "family" thanksgiving picture and see how different it was from the Bird family traditional picture. My TCIS family is significantly shorter. :)

Starbucks definitely makes me feel at home with a peppermint soy mocha. Yum. There are exactly 2 Starbucks in Taejon and I know how to ride the bus to both of them. I don't know where the post office is, where to find hooks to hang my Christmas lights, where Korean women over 5'6'' find jeans, but dang it, I know how to ride the bus to Starbucks.

Some of my students, like Heeju, definitely give me a sense of home because they remind me why I'm here. It feels like home because it HAS to. If it doesn't feel homey, I'm just another teacher here for a 2 year traveling opportunity. I don't want to be that teacher. I like Heeju because she is joyful all of the time. Even when she is tired or confused in class, she remains joyful. I want to be like that here - even when the coffee lady messes up my order because my Korean stinks, or when I am angry with a Korean but can't communicate it, or when I am so bogged down with work there isn't even a good place to start...JOYFUL.

I cried a few times this week. Sometimes it was for me because I felt sorry for myself for picking this job and choosing Bali over my family this Christmas. Sometimes it was for someone else like my brother who lost Josie, his sweet dog who he has loved for many years. I cried because I don't play with Rosa enough and yet need her so much. I cried because I couldn't be there for my brother. I cried because my mom misses me and I miss her. I cried because my stupid Vonage phone is broken and can't stay in any sort of loop, no matter how small, back home.

I wonder if Jesus cried this much. He traveled all over the place and had to leave His friends and family. He didn't have email or Skype. He had that Holy Spirit thing going on and the power to do miracles, but no email! How did He survive?! If Jesus can wander around without a cell phone, high speed internet access, or a facebook account and still remain joyful, then I think I can figure out a way to find 'home' here. :)

Nothing is Impossible

This is the motto of one of my newest friends in Korea. It is his dream to be the kick boxing champion of Korea. He trains at SungMMA gym (which means Star Mixed Martial Arts) with a man I know only as "Captain". It is also Captain's dream for 5 of his newer fighters to make it professionally. He considers anyone who trains in his gym to be family and treats them as such. I experienced this warm Korean way of life after giving in to my friend Lloyd's request that I go to a party at SungMMA to meet his friend who is (direct quote) 'an agressive, muscular Korean man who doesn't speak English.' Not to mention unattractive according to Lloyd.

'But why me?' I asked.
'Because you're exotic and I think you would put up with him,' replied Lloyd.
'Thank you?' I was a bit confused.

You can see how excited I was to go to this party.

But this week has taught me two things;
1. Trust Lloyd with a grain of salt. 2. Roll with the punches.

At the party, I was introduced to a handsome, very nice, muscular Korean man who spoke some English. Nice job Lloyd. Captain encouraged me and my friend Emily to come back the next day to train. We said we would. We did. As a result, I know how to choke Emily 3 different ways and wrap my legs around her head like an octopus. We had been suckered into a jujitsu class. Captain was more than happy to (loudly) speak English directions for us. Note: I am using 'English' very loosely. Every 26th word he spoke was English. Apparently, we were a hit because we showed up on the gym's web page the following day. Nothing says "Wow I'm cool!" like an over sized bright blue jujitsu outfit.

I liked the outfit so much, I went back the following day to get a kick boxing lesson. I showed up only to be informed the guys were leaving for an hour to go weigh in at another gym for their upcoming tournament. On my way out of the gym they yelled, "Where you go!? Come with us!" So I did. It took a minute for me to realize that I had hopped into a car of a Korean man I had just met with 2 other kick boxers that didn't speak English and we were on our way to who-knows-where to do who-knows-what.

On the ride to destination X, I found out more about the driver and didn't feel so bad for jumping into his car. I also found out first hand what is meant by 'weighing in.' The fighters have to make a certain weight to be in the most desirable weight class. This means you have a gym full of very hungry, strong, 90% naked Korean men waiting to get on a scale. Not only was I the only white person in the gym, I was the only woman. No one seemed to care I was there, maybe because they were so hungry. This country really needs to make up its mind about nudity. As Emily put it "If you're outside, you need a bronze shield of clothing, but if you're inside, being naked is just fine."

This is only the beginning of my kick boxing adventure.

Upon our return to SungMMA, I was given a personal lesson by Captain and his protege, Woo Hyun. Apparently, I have "Bery bery good porm! Powerpul punchee!" (very good form, powerful punch). YES!

Fast forward to Saturday morning. By 9:30 Emily and I were on our way to watch our first kick boxing competition starring 4 of SungMMA's fighters. Much to our surprise, the competition actually featured each of Korea and Japan's top 2 kick boxers. Of course, we made it on tv because we were the only foreign women in the building. The highlight of the afternoon was the warm up coat of Korea's champion: shiny with sequins, red tassels, and pink shorts. He lost, to a Japanese guy who showed up in an ugly t-shirt.

Captain took us out to dinner and pointed out that I was sitting next to the former heavyweight kick boxer champion of Korea from 2 years ago. Maybe I should have figured that out when he drove us to dinner in his Lexus.

After a long meal of broken English and Korean, Captain convinced a few of us there was really no way to end a great day, except to norebang (Korean karaoke). He was right. While singing the infamous Titanic theme song 'My Heart Will Go On,' upon the request of 4 Korean kick boxers, I once again realized that God's plan is so much greater than mine.

Unexpectedly, He gave me new friends who I am very grateful for (Dah Hae, a girlfriend of one of the fighters, is such a blessing!), a new work out (I WILL fit into that bikini before traveling to Bali!) and rest from thinking about work. It's easy to forget about the 7th day and the purpose of rest. I didn't even know I was in need of mental rest until this weekend. It's amazing how God can take a seemingly undesirable proposition from Lloyd and turn it into new friends, new experiences, and the opportunity for rest.

Ms. Buh Duh

My students think it's funny to say my name with a Korean accent. It comes out "Buh Duh". Or they like to call me Ms. Seh, which literally means 'bird'.

While in Seoul this weekend, a number of funny things happened. One of them involved this bird.

MTV's Real World - Korea

I tried to cook, really I did. That pile of black stuff is actually rice and was pretty tasty. Apparently you are supposed to soak the rice for an hour and then drain it before cooking. Since I cooked according the recipe on the back of the rice bag (ie, looked at the pictures and guessed what the writing meant) the bit about the hour soak n' rinse slipped right by me.

Tonight Rosa was getting irritated that the maid hadn't come by to pick up that MESSY room so she hid for awhile. It seemed as if she escaped into the wilderness of my apartment building but was discovered comfortably cuddled under the sink.

My life is settling into the common cold, the quiet walk home, the much needed escape to the coffee shop, the familiar greeting from the old man selling fish pastries, the calming smiles of my yoga instructor (she thinks its funny one of my legs is longer than the other), and the constant nagging of uncorrected quizzes in my bag quietly reminding me that work is never ending until June. I'm strangely ok with the settling. Usually I hate knowing change isn't around the corner to make things exciting. Today I'm just hoping something stays the same for at least a week! Am I getting old? Maybe. Am I ok with that? Absolutely. At least for now. Give me another week. :)

Changing faces of KorRosa

Rosa is a funny cat because she is needy. Sometimes. She has been particularly needy the past 2 weeks. She would immediately start meowing whenever I sat down, when I moved from room to room, while brushing my teeth...basically, all the time. She meowed at me until I picked her up, loved on her a bunch or played with her for awhile. This seemed to work until a few days ago when I noticed her water dish wasn't what you'd call 'clean'. I cleaned it out, filled it up again with filtered water (Korean water is apparently not what you'd call 'clean' either), and she hasn't whined for attention since. Her only source of hydration was probably making her feel sick, thus the extra love needed. I'm a little sad because while Rosa was having a rough few weeks, I was too and needed her just as much as she needed me. Do I crave attention because I also have a source that is unclean and is making me sick? Much like my dirty dishes that have been whispering "Clean us....clean us!!!", no one is going to clean it out for me. Where is the maid? Seriously?!

Korea's mood seems to change with the scenery. The 4million dollar golden Buddha here was incredible to see, but strange at the same time. I felt like Moses after coming down from the mountain...are people really worshiping a gigantic golden idol? The mountain we visited was called Songnisan. The rock pile is not a child's idea of fun, but prayer rocks. I'm not sure if they pray while they're stacking them or afterwards. I can imagine a monk carefully making his pile of rocks, placing each one so gently, and with the concentration of a skilled Jenga player, nudging the last one on the top, while another monk sneaks up behind him and yells "Boooooddha!" Hahahaha!

I thought it would be a nice serene, quiet hike through the woods on a beautiful fall day, but there were probably 8,000 people there! Where else would 46 million Koreans go on the weekend to have fun? Of course I would expect to see a million people in downtown Daejon, but not in the mountains! The only refuge we got was when we took a much less traveled path to a hermitage where the female monks live. I didn't see any, but I bet they have killer quad muscles.

Lately, comfort has come from duk guk. Its a rice patty soup (see previous blog picture) that burns the top of my mouth because it is so hot, but it warms my spirit, maybe because I think the women working in the restaurant made it just for me. Tonight after eating my duk guk and finding a vendor that sells Korean pancakes (syrup baked in the MIDDLE!), I was happy with a full belly. And then I saw him. A man with a full blown mullet in a salon, styling a Korean woman's new cut. He was fantastic...they way he styled her hair reflected his carefully crafted mullet and insanely tight vest. I stopped dead in my tracks and said, "I need that man to cut my hair." Thankfully, a friend was with me and lured me into a makeup shop where I sweet talked a lady into giving me free lotion.

Until I feel the urge to go back to my mullet hair professional, I will stay at home and play with Rosa even if she doesn't need me to clean out her dish today.

Flowers, Food, & Fall

Fall fall fall....fun fun fun

Korea - where the elephants and buffalo roam?

There's no particular reason why the picture of a myself and a buffalo was posted other than I am having a crappy day and it makes me laugh. It was taken in the Black Hills of South Dakota 5 minutes after I claimed that anyone who suggested there were real buffalo in the Hills was a buffoon. After this one, we saw 3 more!

Today was not what you might call a good day, but it wasn't horrible. It's amazing what a lack of sleep will do to your face. I looked like I might bust out into tears all day because I was so tired. It's days like this that make me question whether or not I should have children - the thought of having this almost-in-tears-face for 18 years terrifies me.

I have also questioned this week whether or not I'm supposed to have children or even get married. Would it really be that bad? There are plenty of ways to 'have kids'; in the classroom, my brothers' children, kids that I coach, my friends kids, the neighborhood kids. All of these children need parenting and it shouldn't have to come from just one set of parents. The cheesy quote about how it takes a village to raise a child, really has some value in it.

There are lots of things that should be written and shared right now, but my face hurts from looking so sad and tired all day. I should really give it a rest or it might freeze like that guy's face in the back row. That picture makes me laugh too. The figures are Buddha's personalities expressed by different statues, except the one in the middle is so out of place! I wonder if that's what I look like to Koreans....

This is a day when it would be awesome if God would follow me into the locker room with His clipboard, throw it on the ground, get a little loud and angry with my lack of trust and patience, and then give me a pep talk. He would point out a few specific mistakes I've made, give me some suggestions and then say, "Fix it. Make the adjustment! Go get 'em!" And then I would be really inspired and fired up and run out of the locker room while God pats me on the back, calmly gathers up His clipboard and goes back to watch me try to play better.

But He did give me a pep talk through 1 Timothy 6:11. "But you [Meredith], belong to God; so run from all these evil things, and follow what is right and good. Pursue a godly life, along with faith, love, perseverance, and gentleness." 'Don't forget to use your head fake before you drive the lane for a layup. Finish hard, but lay it up soft, like an egg.' That last part is paraphrased from memories of coach Randy. :) It's all good advice.

Quick, Like a Dust Bunny!

Since I've been here, I've rearranged my apartment at least 4 times. There are only so many ways to arrange a couch, chair, desk, bookshelf and 2 tables. I might be running out of ideas. Every time I move a piece of furniture, a sweet little dust bunny waits for me. This also seems to be a theme of my life at the moment. Every time I attempt to rearrange parts of my life, there are dust bunnies in the form of unfinished business, hard feelings, brokenness, and wasted time. It is frustrating to have to clean them up, but at the end of the day, I like my newly decorated trailer, I mean, apartment. Rosa likes it too. She is curled up in my lap and casually tilts her head back to look at me and purr. She probably can't wait to run around and make more dust bunnies. I think she just smirked at me.

I am not in any way agreeing with Buddhism, but if you have ever watched them worship, you would notice their focus. They're not concerned with how many tests they haven't graded yet, how much sleep was lost due to last nights 9pm coffee, the guilt they feel because they didn't do their Korean language homework this week, their feelings of shame because they cheated out on their devotional time, and they certainly are not worried about their biological clocks exploding next month when they turn 26. Of course they don't worry about these things, they're monks. I don't worry about those things either. Right. And Buddha is a size 6 and a natural blond.

I'm reading a book about cleaning out the dust bunnies in our lives so that we can have a closer relationship with God. I like it because it gives clear instructions. I don't like it because the author makes it sound so easy! Step 1. Get rid of distractions such as your tv. (this took me a total of 5 hours because a side affect turned out to be the oh-so-necessary rearranging of the rest of the apartment!) I'd like to go back to Udo (island pictured above. I snorkeled at the bottom of that cliff! Thanks again, DJ for saving my life...) where they don't have a lot distractions. I can't even write this freaking blog without being distracted. So basically.....I'm on step one.

Despite my minuscule spiritual progress, this week was very encouraging. It was SEW, or Spiritual Emphasis Week at TCIS. During the week we had mini concerts, devotionals, fun and fellowship, and a speaker from the states gave a message every day. He liked to say, "Precious teenager....." and then tell them something really wonderful about God's love. I liked that. Over 40 kids accepted Christ into their hearts. It was a really cool thing to be a part of.

I procrastinate sleep because I know my new Korean words will be running through my head - my name in Korean is 'Meh-ruh-dee-suh Buh-duh'. Kinda sounds like Melodies Butt. Great. 'Golgi Shilayo!' (Meat, I don't like it!) I am thankful though, that the dust bunnies under my bed (the ones that make my eyes itch and prevent me from breathing properly) have been taken care of, at least for tonight. Tomorrow, instead of getting the ones inside of my trailer apartment, I'll clean out some dust bunnies in me. Jal Ja, Precious Friend! :)

Korea is Kool

I have compiled a short list of things that I love about Korea. You may or may not agree with me. Tough luck, go eat some kimchi.

- Etiquette bells in the bathroom. Fun!
- The joy Koreans get from watching slapstick comedy
- There are 8 pieces of gum in a pack instead of 5! YES!
- The man next to me can't read what I am writing in my journal and why I'm laughing writing it
- You can buy triangle packs of rice and tuna. YUM.
- Old Korean men (most of them)
- Standing only room on long train rides.....NOT!
- Ajima visors - like a sun visor and a welding cap all in one!
- Korean kids. They are so cute and love to practice their English. The nugget above was a friend we met at Jejudo.

There are things I don't like about Korea too, but will wait until I'm really angry about it to write it. For now, I'll just be thankful for the things I've grown to love about this country.

Mashesoyo!

Alias in Korea?!

My spirits were just lifted when I stumbled across an episode of my favorite tv series of all time; Alias. The main character is Sydney Bristow, a double agent for the CIA. Sydney's heart is so pure and she cares so deeply for the people around her. She is constantly fighting evil but often gets deceived by those that she trusts. Yet she never stops trusting and believing in people. There is a little Sidney Bristow in me. I'm glad she made it to Korea too.

This week was Chusok, Korea's Thanksgiving. A huge group of mostly new TCIS staff decided to head off to Korea's Hawaii - Jeju Island. The weather was perfect and the people were amazingly generous and kind (except for the bus driver who didn't like my tube top and suggested in Korean that I wear Korean clothes. I suggested he make some that fit me, along with some other things. He's lucky he didn't understand English.)

During our stay, we spent one night in Udo, a very small island off of the main island. After a long walk around the island in the dark, a truck picked us up and took us to a seafood restaurant. A few in the group didn't want seafood, so the waitress ordered chicken from a different restaurant!! When we were finished with an amazing meal, the Catholic owner gave us a ride back across the island to our pension. The next day, we woke up early to watch the sunrise. It was very refreshing.

The rest of the day was filled with a jog around the island, snorkeling along the rocky wave ridden shore (thanks DJ for saving my life a few times) riding scooters (thanks DJ for nearly taking my life by running our scooter into a COP car) and snorkeling again along a much calmer, yet forbidden shore (who knew you're not supposed to swim near a boat landing? Not me....I can't read signs written in Korean...) I also made a new friend, SungJik who works on the island. He is also Christian so we had lots to talk about. It was a wonderful day.

The most unexpected part of my trip was the relationships that were strengthened and developed. I was nervous about traveling with so many people - group travel usually induces a gag reflex for me - but I have learned that God shows up in places where He is least expected, like Dunkin Donuts. I don't even like Dunkin' Donuts and a bagel with cream cheese really shouldn't take 15 minutes to make. But God used that time and took previous feelings and impressions I had about someone and gave me a chance to change them. I am very very grateful for that chance.

I am also grateful for the chance to read peculiar quotes on a coffee shop wall and rock out at the norabong with my new friends.

It seems that Rosa was pretty mad when I got home because I was greeted with a hiss. She forgives pretty easily though and is currently watching Alias - it is definitely her favorite show too. More people should be like Rosa (both in the forgiving and Alias aspects).

To see more of the Jeju fun, http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=5134&l=1d340&id=514913255

Off to bed - only one more day of being thankful for Korean Thanksgiving. :)

Love to my meguks! (Americans)