stuck in the middle

As an instinctive peacemaker who hates conflict, I have often taken the place of the mediator in my family, in groups of friends, in the classroom, and in the locker room of a dramatic 9th grade girls basketball team. I am beginning to feel that God has been preparing me to be a mediator for Him in those same areas, but I don't feel ready yet. Isn't that what He's all about, though?

God loves to throw us into the fridge to show us that we WILL find a way out before we freeze to death. Its dark when the fridge door closes, but we know what it looks like; we know how many shelves are in there, how many half used bottles of ketchup and salad dressing are in the door. We even know how to maneuver to avoid the month old container of moldy soup. We can manage. Our biggest problem is our fear and panic because we refuse to sit still for a minute, take a different perspective, and trust that whomever threw us in there believes we are smart enough to get out. He knows we can handle it and even left some cheese, extra potato salad, and a coke to give us a boost.

It just seems lately that I'm allergic to the "cheese" left in my "fridge". This is funny to those of you who know that I am nearly allergic to dairy. My figurative cheese is giving me a literal stomach ache.


What if the things I've been provided with here won't last or stand up to whatever is waiting for me back home? I'm unsure I'll be able to kick the door open in enough time before becoming an apathetic ice woman. Just watching the news is overwhelming enough to send me to bed. I'm not depressed, I'm not even discouraged. It is just fear of the fridge, which can sometimes be pretty powerful. Then Rosa reminds me to look at my pretty Christmas tree and get over it, it's Christmas. (She is very pleased with the festive decorations this year). "I mean, really," she says, "Jesus was born in a barn; you can at least muster up some hope and a little faith." She's pretty smart, for a cat.


I think I'll take her advice and just keep walking in the middle and enjoy Christmas.